Err....Excuse me?

Well, if you had been talking to me for the past few days, then you would have either known that

• I went to Kuantan by bus
• And i lansuk-edtalked to a stranger who was sitting next to me in the bus and we exchanged contacts.

woohoo! XD

You know, lansuk people like that turns out to be pretty exciting and interesting. You have to think of all the topics you could bring into your conversation and make sure you don't ask a question or bring up a statement that will end up in the other one totally ignoring you and freezing cold silence. Also, you have to know the right timing to say the right words. You don't start off with saying "Hey, want to go out with me?" That ruins everything. Usually that line and the typical "Can i have your phone number?" line comes at the end before parting.

Anyway, I only started to talk to her by the second half of the trip. And it began with a smile when we both saw each other munching on different flavored Rocky. Then, it took me 30 minutes to come up with my pick up line and everything worked out perfectly after that. No abrupt endings, no cold shoulders. ho ho ho. =D

Now, i have another Sarah friend. Turns out she is an original orang Kuantan that is doing her advanced level diploma in college TAR. And she is 22 with a smile when looked from side, reminds me of zoe. (WHERE ARE YOU LAR ZOE?) By the way, having someone to talk to on long journey trips makes a year looks like an hour. Time just flies. seriously.

Oh, in any case, if you were wondering what was my pick up line.

"Err....excuse me? How long is it going to be before we reach kuantan?"

And no. I am not interested in her. Only making new friends lar.

Nigel's moving, but i ain't gay.

Well, haven't you heard? Nigel's moving to Mars and he ain't coming back no more. In any case, if you have got no idea who Nigel is, this is him. So, for the very last time before he takes off in his Waja-shaped shuttle (so malaysiaboleh!) with all his belongings and furniture and clothes and undergarments and stuff like that, we went out for the last time(?). Of which, i discovered/realized a few interesting facts.

1. We have never ever went to the cinemas together before for the past 9 years.
2. He now goes to cyber cafes for Left 4 Dead 2. (a new kaki! but sadly, now moving to Mars)
3. I think that's all. Only two, now three.

We started off our last Earth trip together at a cyber cafe playing L4D 2(which is a zombie shooting game, very addictive, very cheegek, and very naueseatic for some people.), screaming and asking for help as well as giving orders to each other and the other ignoring it and laughing like hell while hacking away zombieheads.Then, off we went for our first movie together!

Actually, it's pretty depressing to know that yesterday was the first time we watched a movie together and probably the last time till kingdom come. Not the part of watching the last movie that's sad. But beause we used to be best friends and stuck so close together and we have never done a lot of things together yet. Anyway, back to where i paused for a moment.
We watched Avatar, which was a pretty good movie with shadows and elements of many other films in it. Rambo, District 9, Jurrasic Park, Star Wars, Surrogates, Pochahontas(is this how you spell it?) and of course Titanic. So, you tell me? how can this not be good, right?
We went for dinner and pool later on. And that is how we ended our last Trip travelling on Earth together.

I wasn't sad at all. Not as sad as i was when he told me he was moving. Well, how do you react to that when he's been your friend, and a very close one for 9 years? I am one who hates parting, and one who's afraid of losing something i cherish. Hmm. You want to listen to me brag on about our friendship, no? yea. you want it.

When i first met him back in primary school, i was still a boy with no good friends. Most of the friends i had were those that will play with me and scream along while running down the corridors but still fight with me in the end. wtf. So when he appeared in class one fine day, i was determined to make him my best friend. lol. And then i tried different ways of approaching him as well as trying to impress him with stupid jokes. So in the end, we got on pretty well.

Then the secondary school part, i believe that most of you already know much about it. How i deteriorated and then did not become classmates no more. Yea. Then, we always run out of conversation topics and ending up in silence and smiling stupidly at each other. I used to be always so afraid that one day our friendship would one day fall apart, which it did not.

Okay, i just remembered some of the things we did together. One was drawing comics, then renting it to other classmated for ten cents per page and then photocopying it and selling it. The other was playing bowling. And also pool. yea, that pretty sums up all the stuff we did together that was pretty memorable lar. haha. still got one lar, i am just too lazy to type them out.

I suck at parting. So bad that all the words i said to my sis when she had to go to the states to study was babai and the nothing else. Now i have run out of words. I don't think i even write this much when i broke up with my exgf. hahaha. But i believe nigel knows everything i want to say, after all, he's still one of the best friends i have.

I have to say it. I am not gay. For your info. I repeat. I am not gay. I just like boys. wtf. AHAHAHHAHA. joking one.

haha. have a safe flight lar dude! =D

Dizzy in my head

Warm sandy beach and bare feet go very well together

The disappointment of realizing that you are not the person I expected you to be was subtle yet it tenderly poked at my heart. I was not aware at that moment that that sentence would continue to ring in my mind one week later and even manifest in the form of a dream. It's odd how reality can be so tenderly brutal. Guard your heart. I'm so glad it's not bleeding. Perhaps it just got a tiny little scratch. Boys! Pfffffftttt. *rolls eyes*

Hard Rock hotel oozes AWESOMENESSSSSS

'Btw, I miss you. In case you don't already know.' :)))))) we need more guys with such great sensitivity. Call me insecure, but it's so pleasant to hear feelings being expressed directly in a sweet and simple way.

Mmmmm...

Succeeding in entering a good university because of a good application which you cooked up (with the help of others) does not make you a success in any way. If you continue to try to take the easy way out, you will never survive university, or life, for that matter. Please do your own work and research. Have your own opinion and thoughts. Money is not everything. What truly matters in your life?

:))))))))))

LIFE OF PI IS OHMYGOSH SO FANTASTICALLY-AWESOMELY-WONDERFULLY-MINDBLOWINGLY BRILLIANTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!! BEST BOOK I'VE READ OF MY LIFE. PERIOD.

Rawrrrr!

If I do not drop dead out of tiredness by the end of this month, it'd be miracle. Dear LORD, I need your strength.

!

This is JOYCE blogging. Not Sorkia.

I do not condone dingalicious!!!

Ten

I will...

1. stop speeding

2. be a very safe driver

3. be a more courteous driver

4. study

5. enjoy December

6. stop being a stalker

7. pray more

8. learn to shut up

9. be less impulsive

10. NOT GIVE UP ON UNIVERSITY APPLICATIONS

Limited Freedom

Freedom...

Can mean so many things.

Holidays are hereeee. :) The odd thing about this time's holidays is that it crept up slowly upon me and lunged upon me when I least expected it. The liberation from Hamlet, King Lear and Malaysian studies came as a huge relief but one that falls short of joy. This freedom from classes and college is one that is sudden, almost uninviting at first, but finally received with much gratitude because as much as I love free periods, I'm reminded that I don't thoroughly enjoy most of my classes and hasten the passing of them.

"My holidays just started. I WANT TO SLEEP."

This perhaps just reinforces the fact that SOME PEOPLE drill in my head all the time "You very aunty ar." but who cares? Sleep is essential to animals. I still find it hard to accept - it's November already?! Nevertheless, I'm glad that the holidays are here because I can finally sleep peacefully without worrying about my coursework any more. I will never touch another Shakespearean play every again (lest I major in English Lit). He's brilliant and all but he has brought far too much stress and far too many sleepless nights upon me.

That is the question -

You know you've made it BIG when 400 years later, a line from your play is used as a t-shirt design.

Then there's freedom such as finally passing your driving test. On the fourth attempt. The fact that I'll never seeing another bukit and my driving instructor every again made me almost dissolve into tears and out of relief. Then comes the freedom of actually driving around on your own. I drove alone to Jusco today and successfully reverse parked all on my own! Fine, I chose 3 lots with no cars in it so that I can reverse without the fear of crashing into a car but it's a start to awesome reverse parking skills. I still have to work on driving close enough to the ticket machine to feed my parking ticket into it with ease. Either that or I've to live with it for the rest of my life simply because my arms are too short.

Shopping alone has proved to be a great joy (though I would choose to do it in the company of my sis if I had the choice)! I could go into any store I want, for as long as I like and choose the size of my clothes without having to feel paiseh as I do when I go with my friends. :P A clown was hanging around Jusco entertaining kids with balloons. School holidays seem like a thing of such a long time ago... As I heard the echoes of the kids' laughter while choosing hair rubber bands, somehow the idea of clowns being happy people who spread joy and laughter made me feel a tinge of sadness. Beneath the white face paint, red nose, and ugly wig attached to a hat lies someone who hurts and cries just as everyone of us do.

While I was walking around on my own, it struck me more strongly than ever that I am old enough to be independent, have babies and have to learn how to survive on my own. It's wonderful to be able to go shopping on my own, drive my own car, go out with high school friends till relatively late at night, go to Penang without any adult supervision and the list goes on and on. This freedom, although seemingly exciting at first, turns out to be extremely scary and needs to be treated with serious caution. I can screw up my whole life just by driving a bit too aggressively, spending a bit too much time out of home, letting my procrastination carry on and on... I suddenly find myself inching away from this freedom that I've been anticipating for a long time. I don't like it as much as I had thought I would. The thought of having someone control my life seems inviting. You can have it. If my life screws up, it's not my fault! I won't need to worry. I won't need to fear.

Freedom restricts. It's weird.

The land of CBs.

What does Kuantan has to offer?

Smoothest taufoofa ever;Best Pau in Malaysia;dried-salty-big-mouth fishes;And a lot of car number plates to keep you amused on the road. wtf.

CBs. XD

I want to be serious. Fail.

All the comments you guys left for the last post was great and real motivating! I really appreciate that. Seriously, i really feel like starting to be serious and do real serious posts here from now on. You get what i mean, no? No funny stuff. No mocking people. No more lame jokes. And then all will be about helping those people in need. Criticizing the government. Promoting world peace. Dedicating my blog for the greater good.

But, i don't think i can. Especially the part on no funny stuff and no lame jokes.

Why? Because at that very instant i finished reading nigel's comment of me being an angel's advocate, an image flashed before my eyes.

You tell me. If blogging is all about expressing one's thoughts, do you think i'd be able to suppress all these and just concentrate on blogging about the serious stuff?

Nah. I don't think so.

p/s sorry! if this picture hurt your feelings/mock your god/shows no respect for your religion. No offense. =)

Tell me what to do.

I am having my AS finals right now and for almost everyday during this period of time, i can't get my mind off the next coming test and all the preparations and formulas and bloody assumptions and shitty stuff ALL related to the exams.

Pathetic. Blame myself for not playing the paying attention in class.

Last Saturday, i was in desperate need of getting ink cartridges for my printer as i needed to print the exercises out. But the shop where i usually get my ink supply from was closed, so i had to drive around my neighbourhood to look for one. I got to the busiest part of my neighborhood - where all the banks, the shops, the everything are- and then i couldn't help but to notice this scene which totally got my mind off the coming exam and the shitty stuff.

I saw this kitten straying outside the bookshop.
It was still, obviously, very young and still at the stage of learning new stuff. It did not scurry away like all the other older cats did when someone was nearby, but instead walked side by side with the people walking along the corridor. It could not walk properly on four, and occasionally tripped a little and tried to support itself up. Then, it would look around. And then it would continue to walk and look around.

I stood there, by the entrance of the book store and i watched the kitten move around as if looking for food. I looked around and got to a nearby cheecheongfun stall and bought 3 fishballs for the kitten.

I got back and left two on the ground. I ate one. lol wtf. And then i stood by and watch as the kitten finished them up.
As soon as it had finished up the two fishballs, i left with so many emotions and thoughts boiling inside me.

Well, let's just say i've got so many things running in my mind at that moment and I just don't feel like saying it all out here. I felt exactly like then when i visited the orphanage. And how am i able to describe the feeling of helplessness? You see someone who needs help. You want to help. You try to help. Somehow, you just can't help. You can't do anything to help. Tell me. I just don't know the word to describe such helplessness.

As i got to my car, I saw this kid sitting on a stool by the cheecheongfun stall, munching away happily. Such contrast in life. And I can't do a thing to help.

Escape to happyeverafterland FAIL.

Today, i feel like running away and go off to a far far land and live happily after. So, i built myself a raft out of twigs and as you can see, a big heart shaped leave with many holes on it to serve as a sail.


I was very happy. And then i realised it was too small. So, i rebuilt a bigger one, still with dry twigs, but minus the cacat sail.


And then when everything was set and ready to go, i pushed it out for a test ride.

Fail. wtf.

So, happily-ever-after life would have to wait. And before that, Physics and Bio 2 would still have to come first. wtf wtf.

Of graduation, saying bye bye and the huge gap.

I should have waited for the photos from dailou before i publish this post. But wth. All the emotions are cramming up in me and somehow the photos can wait.

This morning was the 48th graduation ceremony for the chonghwaians. Yea. I got up early in the morning - earlier than usual school days lar- just for attending the ceremony. Somehow, even though i was not in school this year, the excitement and all the feelings in me were not much different from any graduates this year, i can asssure you.

I missed out the first hour of the event. I got in and sat down next to dailou, with jenny right behind him. They were busy writing stuff in their class mag. Leaving messages for their classmates and so. There were chatterings. The people were kind of noisy. Still, anyone could feel that the air was pervaded with deep feelings. The kind of feeling before parting. And people around me did not smile much. Those familiar smiles were not on their faces today. Today was different.

If you had noticed. Then you would have seen those gestures people make trying to cover up their anxiety of parting with their friends in a few hours time. Their restlessness on their seats. Their urge to strike a topic to talk to the one next to them to distract others from noticing the sadness upon their faces. The looks on their faces when looking at their classmates, wondering if they are going to meet again in the future, or probably hoping that that particular moment would never end. And some, some of them just looked at the stage blankly while the feelings inside them were bubbling incessantly.

And then it was time to sing the national anthem, the school song, just to name a few. I had never sang so seriously in my life. Probably it was because this was the last time i could stand side by side with my schoolmates -those that i hd grew up with- and sing. I was totally surprised, when i realised i actually had memorised the lyrics for the school anthem and i never knew that.

Then, classes went on stage and took photos. They raced each other up and for a moment or so, i regretted taking a levels instead of uec. I stood below the stage and looked up at them. If i feed on emotions, the stage could already supply me for a year or so, with 3 meals a day. Some were screaming, some were crying, some were shouting with joy, some just smiled, some just stood there and looked down, some were...

The ceremony was over, and people came down from the stage. Girls were crying and hugging each other. Boys on the other hand, patted each other on the shoulders, some hugged. Even a stone would turn soft at that moment. Well, one of my friends who always looked tough cried. And that was not something happy to see.

I went to the movies after that. Watched a canton movie called the Poker King. The movie was pretty funny. But, occasionally, when i laughed, i turned to look at junhui beside me. He was not laughing. And then my laughter would die out and i would turn back to look at the screen trying to ignore him. He was the joker among his friends. And to see him not laugh was like seeing the sky not turning blue in the morning which makes people feel yea, sad.

And as i drove home later on, the sky was blanketed with dark clouds and sooner enough, the rain began to fall.
________________

Well, something to laugh about - I tried sneaking in with my chong hwa school uniform on today. But, sadly, i got caught by the discipline master who insisted to have my hair cut short. wtf. And after much explaining that i was not a senior 3 student, he literally pulled and dragged me out of the school and made me change back to my casual wear. haha wtf.

Also, I saw a few teachers today, who said that i had lose weight. HAHAHAHHAHA. If you don't believe, i have a picture as proof! Look at the HUGE gap between my tummy and the pants. WAHAHAHAHHAHAHHA. The pants used to fit me just well. LOL



p/s will post the pictures up as soon as i get them. and ex-chonghwaians, cheer up! =)

Random thoughts and review on Ninja.

I woke up at 10.30 today, which was like the first time of my life. Yea. I never tried waking up later than 930. I was not surprised, for for the past few days, i have been worried sick of my test and had nightmares about failing my test/not able to finish my test on time and shit like that. Fortunately, yesterday turned out to be quite okay.

A levels has totally turned me into a hardworking boy. *pride! Like really sit down and not just stare at the book for hours without flipping a page, but really look into it and studying real hard. And i am not surprised if i find out there's a hemorrhage in my brain any time. exaggerates, wtf. When in secondary school, i never ever gave a damn in all the tests. I would just flip through and then play. Now, it's just totally different.

____________

So, as i was saying, because the test that i had been worrying sick of was over yesterday, and the next test is like 5 days away, I went to the cinema for a small celebration with the mutiaracarpark band and a few other friends.

We watched a movie called Ninja. Despite of my love for ninjas ever since i was young, i find the storyline of the movie pretty urm... bad.


The gadgets are cool, the actress is pretty.
And all the others, they suck big time. It's like watching a remake of power rangers.


The hero, check. The ultimate bad guy, check. The brotherhood of badguys, check. The ultimate gadgets, check. The happy ending, check. The only thing different is that the fights were more bloody.

To be honest, i find this movie childish. AHAHAHHAHAHA. Maybe that's because i am 18 now. AHAHHAHAHA.

Still, Batman and all the other superhero's movies are better than this. I just found out from a movie review site, that Ninja is only in the cinemas in Malaysia. In the states, it is a straight to DVD production. And that must be the reason why the movie is bad.

I would rather go watch phobia 2, and freak myself out, than laugh at Ninja if i had knew.

Phobia 2 has this really scary trailer, which i think is COOL! haha. Who wants to go with me? XD

How to score an A in your test.

Books
can fuck off.

Other than that, anything is a good way to pass your finals with flying colours. Really.

Now, Jolin needs me.

To:

the Ding family. the family clan. the joyce. the zoe. the nigel. the iuning. the huiwen. the mutiaracarpark band. the bs3. the chong hwa-ians. the teachers, past and present.

and all the people i've met, loved or hated.

Thank you for growing me up/growing up with me/watching me grow up/teaching me how to grow up.

I am now a real man. WAHAHAHHAHAA.


p/s if you feel excluded from my thank you list because i did not say your name, do tell me. =) and if you don't get it why jolin needs me and not you, check it out here. And to waikin, bui, rose and bird, sorry for failing the surprise. =P

Poach tigresses not.

And you ask why?! Look for yourself.


Poor tiger humping on a dead tree trunk.

When i was 17.

I have lived for 17 years 11 months and 15 days. There are so many things to say about and to finish them, you need at least 17 years. okay, crap. So, it's going to be the 28th once more. And this time, it does not only signify that i am one year older, it also marks the beginning of a new chapter in life.

Well, I wouldn't say i lived a romantic-action packed-out-of-the-ordinary 17, yet, i still find some of the incidents worth remembering.

#1. Learning to drive and drift.

#2.With driving, you can't miss out the accidents as well.

#3. Introduced my ex-girlfriend to my mum and surprisingly she did not kill me.

#4. Did a heart anatomy and tried to eat the heart.
Somehow, the one holding the heart didn't feel happy for me. lol.

#5. Won free tickets to movie premieres because of a slogan of terminating kennysia for having balls bigger than mine. But failed to attend and watch. wtf.

#6. Saw amazing stuff under the microscope.


#7. Got a fine of 100 bucks.

#8. Tried to bribe a police officer with a buck.

#9. Had my dream of becoming a jedi come true.

#10. Walked in a shopping mall with loads of people wearing a mask that resembles an underwear.


#11. Took photo with 4 other boys all crammed inside a photo machine. Don't laugh.

Let's just say the smiley face is to protect his privacy. Still, don't you laugh. haha.

p/s am posting this up early because i need to get real armed for the test. Its my effin AS exam for goddamn sake. And my birthday's stuck between two tests. So lucky lar. Can buy numbers liao. ==

Happy Moon-ish Day.

How did you celebrate last night?


Was it with your family, or was it with your friends?

Or maybe alone?
I still remember those days back then when everything looked bigger and taller. And then these were the days that everyone in the family would show up. The young ones would play with the lanterns, the candles and try to burn the house down. The adults would sit in the garden sipping hot Chinese tea, munching on the mooncakes, talking about everything, and most of all, to prevent us from burning the house down.


As each of the small ones grew up, they left, they moved, and they never showed up again on such occasions. And last night was one of those occasions. The adults said they were tired, the young ones had to celebrate with their friends.

And then there was me.
So, with all the memories of those younger times, i decided to play with the lanterns alone. lol.

Lit up the whole garden with lanterns and sat on the floor and watch the candles go out. Then light them back again. Then watch them go out. Then relight them and watch them again.


The house across the road was full of noise. Cheering, singing and children running around. And here, it was total silence.

I tried to look for the moon but to no avail. The clouds were dancing in the sky. And no moon was to be seen. So i played with the candles and danced on the grass along with Van Morrison's dancing in the moonlight.

So, i played along till around midnight. Cleaned up the mess, and went back into the house.

And that's how life rolls when everyone starts to grow up, don't it? All alone.

On the other hand, burning lanterns down just never felt so good.

MUAHAHAHHAAHAHAHHAHA.

wtf.

Excuses for being absent.

Dearest teacher(s),

Please, can i not go back to school tomorrow?

I still don't feel like going because i haven't finished my homework yet. Not that i never did my homework through out the whole hols, but i need more time to do more revision. Oh, and didn't you receive my invitation card? I am going to get married tomorrow too!
Besides, I also need to save the world, you know. I am Super Prime. The world needs me.
I know all these sound shitty.

Fine. fine. At least do believe that it's the Jurassic Period.
Please, can i not go to school tomorrow?

Update: i got all the results for trials today. I really should seriously go fuck myself. I am such a big time sucker. Throw!

A trip to One-U

Nothing exciting has happened to me lately. Well, some are on their way tho. Like on the 24th, my results for the previous trials. ooh. pretty exciting.

Well, so i went to one u with fuguai people yesterday. And as i was much earlier than they were, i decided to go for bowling. A game costs 8 bucks. throw!
The results were urm...not bad for someone who didn't even stepped into a bowling court for like 3 years.

Then we watched 'Where Got Ghost'. Made me laugh till i almost cried. The laughing scenes are almost incessant. Just so you know. =) movie ticket: 11 bucks.Went for dinner afterwards. And Mr.Fu chose dragon-i. I think that's the name of the shop. lol.


Shredded pork with shredded onion and shredded laaaaaaaaaa-mien. 14 bucks.

Food from Heaven. Ah. The xiaolongpau. The soup that flows out endlessly from this small lump of meat wrapped in flour. And talking about it makes my mouth water once more. 12 bucks. This is Mr. Fu .
The mess we left.
Yes. My bill was 180.55. Only mine.
And this is Mr. Spiderman who, out of the boredom, decided to flash instead of shooting spiderwebs. priceless.