Orientation

has it only been three weeks? three weeks since I introduced myself in front of a bunch of juniors in that small crappy room like a failed job interview despite the infinite times I ran through the introduction in my mind during lectures earlier that morning. i was looking at a group of blank and lost faces who stared back at me and laughed dryly at the jokes I tried to crack and thinking to myself that they must be thinking to themselves who the fuck is this.

but now.

it only seemed like a few moments ago that i was cheering screaming laughing pelvic thrusting with them and there were many times I wished I were with them instead of getting stuck in a room with a woman that read so slow the dinosaurs relived and became fossils again or in a hall where the only thing I see on the screen is all their faces, all enthusiastic and looking ready and set to do something exciting. i must admit that i did dreamt of them. then again, it felt like I was going through orientation all over again. it definitely did not feel like three weeks to me. it only felt like a day and yet, like we have been friends for so long. they were so real, free of false pretenses and had nothing to hide. i wonder at times that if the wall that I had around me still stands as firm as strong as rigid as it used to be. then I realize that there must have been a crack somewhere and something must have seeped through.

here's to new friends and unexpected friendships.

Ivy by the road.

raindrops hit the windscreen like little bombs from the ever gray skies. and if one were to notice, each raindrop hits the pane and more little raindrops bounce off and hit the pane and again and again until kingdom comes. for one moment, the windscreen is clear of the pelting raindrops and the next, its not. it's magic at its best, the thin little back hands say, now you see it now you don't. the road is lit up with dim red lights that brighten and stay in their positions for a while, dimmed down and move on. on the other side, yellow lights pass by, sometimes followed with a splash of water across the windscreen. within this enclosed compartment, there is only silence.

sometime later, the skies smiled and i thought i saw an ivy woke up, stretched it's vines and crept slowly up the spine of a tree by the road.